EXCREMENTATION POINT. 6.7.06
For the writers out there who are up and coming, as well as those who feel their writing just isn't up to snuff, I bestow upon you this single gem of wisdom: exclamation points are for morons, and if your mother writes with exclamation points, she's a moron too. Nothing kills good writing like the exclamation point.
Closely related to laughing at one's own joke, the exclamation point attempts to cram interpretation down your throat, with all the finesse of a teamster eating five-bean chili. When you use an exclamation point, you're admitting to the readers that you simply don't have the talent to communicate a thought without your precious training wheels. Of course, the mark has its uses. Sarcasm, direct quotes... I've no beef with the exclamation point in such applications. But when I see something like the following (ironically, a comment written by an old English teacher on one of my essays):
"This is totally unacceptable!"
a picture instantly develops in my head, of a big, flashing, neon pink arrow pointing to absolutely nothing. If you think you have to add ! to the end of your sentence to let people know you're excited or angry or whatever, then you haven't written anything of substance, and in all likelihood, you speak with the same lack of eloquence.
If what you have to say matters, you won't need any kind of half-ass special effect to top it off. It's why meathead jocks say things like "I'm gonna to kick your ass, fag!", and mentally disturbed introverts prefer something along the lines of, "I'm going to strap you to a chair with a gun taped to your hand, hold your best friend's mouth on the barrel, and tickle you until you accidentally pull the trigger." See? No exclamation point necessary.