POST ARCHIVES (CHRONOLOGY).
Unabridged post archives, sorted by date. Wanna sort by category?
- 2.4.07: Text Messaging: Officially A Bitch Move. How the utilization of text messages perfectly demonstrates the gender gap.
- 12.17.06: For The Man Who Has Everything. eBay caters to celebrities' passing fancies for African children.
- 12.12.06: Memorandum: Company X-Mas Party. How to enjoy the office party and still have a job the next day.
- 11.27.06: An Open Letter To Google. Google versus CWW. TKO, bitches.
- 11.26.06: Oops. Uh, yeah... forgot I had a blog for a week there.
- 11.15.06: Masquerading As A Great Boyfriend. Work smarter, not harder.
- 11.7.06: Exploiting Equal Opportunity. This political b.s. has gone on far enough.
- 11.1.06: Pick A Moron And Pull The Lever. Sorry if you think voting matters. Sorry you're an imbecile.
- 10.27.06: Incentives To Continue Living. Americans need more birthday milestones... and I got ya milestones right here.
- 10.20.06: How To Market To Black Folk. A recipe for chocolatey advertising success.
- 10.14.06: Man Bites Logo. Meridian Communications steals 9rules logo for use with Toyota Manufacturing.
- 10.7.06: Beginner's Guide To A Partisan NYC. A lightning-fast tutorial on which New York City lifestyle you should be a part of.
- 9.30.06: Bum Rush The Bathroom. Waterproof technology meets angry old man.
- 9.23.06: Shitter Shoes. A valuable fashion lesson.
- 9.16.06: The Hidden Meanings of Tattoos. Conforming to nonconformity never felt so good!
- 9.11.06: B-Grade Superheroes. Crime fighting just isn't for everyone.
- 9.3.06: Updating My Aroma. If buying Paris Hilton's cologne makes me any less of a man, then go ahead and bend me over.
- 8.26.06: Hudson River Sculpture Trail. Brought to you by the Association Of Disabled Persons Who Failed High School Metalworking Class.
- 8.20.06: Airbags: Nature's Rubik's Cube. Figuring out my Hyundai's airbag sensor is as easy as 1-2-3. 4-5-6-7-8.
- 8.14.06: Child Celebrities 2.0. Bloggers' children may soon have all the PR issues of a child celebrity, without any of the sex tape profits.
- 8.9.06: Excerpts From My Doctor's Appointment. I'll take a quick-witted doctor over a well-qualified one any day of the week.
- 8.2.06: Conserving Energy During The Heat Wave. When you can tell the temperature by the amount of sweat in your asscrack, you've got issues.
- 7.24.06: Golden Arches and Padded White Rooms. Spending a day with the dysfunctionality that is McDonald's clientele.
- 7.18.06: The SUV: A Red Herring On Steroids. Something to consider before you shake your head in digust at the soccer moms.
- 7.15.06: What Opposable Thumbs Were Meant For. Livin' the dream with my new fan remote.
- 7.8.06: I.T. Department Confessions. A sampling of the wonderful support calls I'll miss as I move on to my new job.
- 7.3.06: Making Snowballs Out of Ice. Bask in the glory of my shaky design metaphor.
- 6.28.06: Apple GarbageBand. Apple's GarageBand software is missing something... maybe it's the letter 'B'.
- 6.21.06: Hybrid Tool Track. I explain Tool's secret two-track combination from their latest album.
- 6.20.06: Langers Juice Has A Disturbing Recipe. Want to know what makes their juice so tasty? Trust me, you don't.
- 6.15.06: Dear Bono: Screw You. The World Cup brings out the best in everyone... except Bono.
- 6.13.06: Pretty Portraits With Photoshop. In thirty seconds, fix what you didn't even know was wrong with your digital portraits.
- 6.7.06: Excrementation Point. Easily the most pathetic of the punctuation marks.
- 6.2.06: That Rhymes, and it IS a Crime. My generation can't write lyrics for crap.
- 5.26.06: Nostalgiamanic Depression. Leave it to me to have a philosophical stance on photographs.
- 5.22.06: Girlfriend Tester. Not sure if your date is a Janine Garofalo or a Paris Hilton? Show her Funny Games.
- 5.18.06: Best Birthday Gift Ever. I'm afraid I will never come across a better gift than this.
- 5.14.06: Mamma Mia. Not all mothers deserve Mother's Day.
- 5.10.06: Google Launches 'Google Trends'. Now you can use pretty bar graphs to find out which country is really the most sex-crazed in the world.
- 5.10.06: Zildjian = Jihad. An unassuming t-shirt angers the simple folk of Pennsylvania.
- 5.9.06: It's OK to Assume. Why your boss needs to stop saying, "don't ever assume".
- 5.3.06: Tool Releases "10,000 Days" Album. Biased review and album art pics inside.
- 5.1.06: Ready, Set, Lease. My proposal for leasing an SUV right freakin' now.
- 4.28.06: The System Works. Edy's Ice Cream responds to my request for more cherries.
- 4.22.06: Homonyms, You Dirty Bastards. Your one-stop shop for figuring these things out.
- 4.17.06: Resale Value: The Other White Meat. A quick tutorial on the importance of your car's resale value.
- 4.15.06: The It'sy Bitsy Spider? The remarkably easy way to discern "it's" from "its".